Chemo - decay and die

 You haven't gone to the doctor so they sent me this video, Meghan? Not even call up a doctor's phone number, the local doctor's clinic, any family doctor for a quick asking any question on your mind? Yeah, any doctor's office. Any family doctor in general.

Are they going to mock me we doing this?

I am not calling today, or last week. I usually...not sure what I see anything is real.

Steve Jobs got weaken, and he got thin down and not feeling well. They kill the good cell and the bad cell, and the metabolism runs down, that age, or the stress, the work load. 

How does he die?

His family is with him, and its the breathing, eventually he dies in the sleep, or unconscious, those kinds.

So its not the painful to die?

I think it is painful, and he can no longer take too many chemotherapy anymore.

The radiation?

Right.

So we will all get thin down looks like him, that kind?

Well, you stay away from the public and get rested.

5 or 6 years, that's it?

You get well then you have another 20 years.

Any doctor you can always talk about a certain thing by yourself.

Like?  "My personality is ....competitive and I have this friends, or the family, to where I care about how they think of me. I do better in life, or I wish them seeing me higher. And among some colleague or some working environment, I get to meet people everyday by the hundred or sometimes I don't even know their names."

You don't really care about what other people think of you, right?

(The birds loud)

"If Wicked (2024) is a new movie with the new set of Hollywood star showing up, they will do that every year, or every 2 or 3 years, something new coming out the new musical, where people singing or dancing, always in the large of the crowd, that goes with the popular vote, whom they choose to be the casting star, whether that story true or not."

Why should I ask things like that?

Lady, anything sounds like a vent always more suit at your personality, you cannot talk about it, then don't talk about it. Just confirm a little bit something see if that makes your mood happy, what can be talk about it, talk about it the next time, around your house, or going along to see a doctor. Ask him about the City of Hope. The cancer treatment or the foreign costs, or anything like that. Your heart, your mind, your soul is to please someone, get their approval all the time.

"If I see Steve Jobs undergoes a treatment, that is 5 or 6 years I seeing my kids grown up. I am not going to get another life, or another marriage or seeing them to have the first boyfriend, or the family all that. Not that I am panicking, I go and see where the things in front of me that day, and sometimes I still wonder this is a beautiful, a quiet home, and be peaceful, everything is where I hope for, and strive to do better. But if I got sick, I can no longer doing anything better. So I should quit?"

You ever thought.... King is in the cancer treatment, and Kate, and then me?! Or those white cloth things you say?

I usually wait a few days my head is clear, what do I seeing things too much is unreal, but I told Shane or Mark when I first knowing or Kian, the timezone. Everyone got tired at their work, and pick up the phone....and I also got tired morning or afternoon to caught up a timezone, and just sleep all the way in between.

You like those Japanese noodles soup?! That time I thought the Hugh's otter was here...I thought to call him through, but then....this he got married date, his son is the spider man. To end up talking to him, or Olivia. And whom is this little otter coming in...

https://www.youtube.com/shorts/LwXuVQd30Oc

You get used to that diet when you were in Toronto downtown?  At home to create this soup brooth.... I done that most time myself, for myself, there are the 4 stoves, so in America you need to drive a lot to going and coming home. Its no longer this Toronto a certain life. I am sure you drive, too. For women's health, that's very good. For your stomach, but after you leave Toronto, you don't usually carry this diet anymore?!

• When people run down, too hungry, too tired, or too dehydrated, they just guggle down any food in front of them. 
• With Shane, he drinks the soup, or the water, then he needs to run to the bathroom, or lay down.
• Because I start to get around...then our schedule has to slow down in the real scene. 
• Like every hour serve him a tea, or a tray, some sneak, some soup, some tea, some fruits, he won't be so hungry til the noon time.
• And prepare his snack, he can run out of the house in his car. Coming home, its the food ready in the fridge. 

Car: https://www.youtube.com/shorts/3sTHUDiEdkg

( Whom is this?  Not that Pope, right? )

You want someone be next by you when you tell your mother on the phone?

Do you wish your mother come and see you, you cannot even move, you freeze inside the house?

Can your mother bring some stuffs for you, the underwear, the dipper, if she has some, or some bed sheet, or some blanket, or some snacks, or some period pad?

Can she stay with you for a few day talking, or she can go with you to the near by doctors, and then to the City of Hope, like she holds your hands, or you want to check some stuffs while you are there, for the cancer or any other type of doctors?

Harry can look at his some food options?

https://www.youtube.com/shorts/knCA5XBS0mE

The panda says he eats these.... https://www.youtube.com/shorts/LwpCghb5G80

Its the Italian pod. 

You want to ask your mother if she can help you do a load of the laundry, and 1 load for the kids, or one for Harry, and can she change the bed sheet, your kids 2 room, or your room, you lay down sleep, she doesn't go, just be 1 more day sit around. You feel comfortable then you talk.

No you just tell her...

"You got married life, you and dad, and I got married once, this time and have the kids. You got married to have me. I don't know what to talk. "

Your mother is aging, you don't ask her now, you are not going to ask her how to do that as she gets older. You see how you feel your mother is around.

You treat her with some attitude before, how you fired everyone all around, those things?

Both you and Kate's stomach going up and down just about anything seeing this Prince, near or far, I can tell you that. Not every women getting married, and say, a long term be with someone, and that is how near, or how well, and how the space you say the romance, or a date, or to be pleased for the work, or being rejected all the time...hurt your feeling, or you really need a hug, or really need that togetherness....and I have no idea what you were doing to end up some of these video on my facebook.

Some older generation, they have a certain language....

You were the working class women before you got married, a professional. The entertainment weight, or those stress sip through your bone, your skeleton. Most younger kid, and their language is with their classmate, then no one knows a thing about cancer, or how you live through and make it in life. Some people write those book, and you can borrow that from the library. You don't have any voice coming near around you anymore....I think you and Kate has too many people to please. 

You looking at them, its hoping they held that responsible for you? Those palace life? I don't think so. But my pinterest telling me something like Wicked if I go to Shane in LA, you go and sleep with William? Its a phone or a talk, to make it the movie: Wicked. 

I know what it means?

The stock market - the analyst 

The otter

I keep seeing that a lot  !! That is you ?!

I am here is my room, and the food is downstair, if I go to LA, the first meal we ever gonna have, its me cooking for Shane. I know that. I hardly leaving my chair, or just lay down my bed. I typing here all day, or the TV outside.